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Well it’s my life, therefore its me; therefore I have no choice but to love it! I thought that I would be in a completely different place right now! I thought that I would be a happy newlywed beginning a new chapter in my life building towards a future.....Not the case! I was mad, then I was sad ,then I was mad again, and then I realized (recently I might add) this is my life I’m exactly where it is I’m meant to be right now! Over the last year I have learned soo much about myself, who I am, who I want to be, and who I’m not.
I know that there are reasons unknown to me why my life is where it is right now, but if I take a step back and look at my life as well as myself I realize that my life is pretty fucking great! I have wonderful people in my life and I’m happy! I have unhappy moments, but I’m happy, I’m beautiful, I’m smart, and TOTALLY on a crazy path of self discovery! I have such a clear picture of what I want in friends what I want in a man what I want in myself ….. It’s like I got a new set of eyes that are wide open.
Now don’t get me wrong I’m not saying I have all the answers because anyone that knows me knows that my shit is still a big mess; relationships, family, love, MONEY. The difference is that I’m different in this mess I have changed my outlook , my attitude, my energy, and ….that my friends…… is a greater gift then if everything in my life was perfect.
I still have a lot of thinking to do, I still have many changes to make, and you know what I still have a shit load of time that I need to spend with myself! Grant it some people may not be happy about that, but right now I’m not in the business of giving a shit about how people feel about me!! I’m working on me and my life and my happiness.... people come and go but u will always be with yourself so one must be true to their needs and their wants because u will be miserable if not.
I have no idea where I’m going I just know that I’m going to be uncontrollable happy on my way there!!!!!
Funny thing is theres a lot more you are going to learn about yourself in the years to come!! Im glad you've made that discovery! Love and appreciate your life cuz you are truly blessed and everyone who has you in their lives should know that they are lucky!!!
ReplyDeleteself-discovery is a beautiful thing and Fritz Perls would be very proud of you cuz I remember Dr. Laurence stating that Perls would advise that all psychologist should be able to dealt with their issue before they practice; however it doesn't entirely imply to you since you don't want to work with people directly...all in all i think u get my drift...
ReplyDeleteself discovery is a path that is not easy but it is quite rewarding in the long run...*snaps*snaps* for you darling
(oops, i used the wrong their-there...oh, my lol)